Learning to wait.

Lamentations 3:22-25
It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in Him.
The Lord is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh Him.



Isaiah 30:18
And therefore will the LORD wait, that He may be gracious unto you, and therefore will He be exalted, that He may have mercy upon you: for the LORD is a God of judgment: blessed are all they that wait for Him.



Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.


Psalm 37:9
For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the LORD, they shall inherit the earth.




I really like those verses. Mainly because we've spent so much time lately waiting on the Lord.
Mom's pneumonia is slowly but surely getting better. We knew it would, but we had no idea it would take as long as it has. In reality, she's only been on her antibiotics for two weeks, and the doctor says it could take a month to 6 weeks before she's back up to par, and even then she could still be weak and winded. The Lord has been with her, and will continue to be with her through the recovery process. I sometimes wonder why she had to get this illness right after the things she's been through with her brain surgery and all........but I try not to question. It's for a reason, and one day maybe we'll know. Until then, I have to learn to "wait". After all, His ways are above my ways, and His time is not my time. So, what can you do? PBW. Pray, Believe, and Wait. As I've said before, we're not people who believe that you just pray once and then you're done. 1st Thessalonians 5:17 says "Pray without ceasing", and there are many days that I am in, what seems to be, constant prayer. It's not out loud, but I pray from my heart. My true desires are there, and God hears me. 

• "Please, Lord, just make mom better." 
• "Please, Lord, help Dan and Dad at their jobs today."
• "Please, Lord, send some business our way if we're meant to keep this store."
• "Please, Lord, help Skyla at her interview today."
• "Please, Lord, get rid of Russ's headache because he has tons of stuff to get done."

Maybe some of you think praying for headache relief is silly. I don't. A hundred thoughts like that per day run through my mind. I'm sincere. I just want what's best for my family. They mean everything to me and I just want them to be happy and healthy. The praying is the easy part. The believing is harder, but all it takes is the tiniest bit of faith and it grows and grows. The waiting is the hardest part of the process.......but I must admit that my impatience is an inherited trait. 
Dad gets extremely nervous while waiting. When I talked to him last night, he admitted this fact, and said that sometimes he couldn't understand why Jesus made us wait. Back in Bible times, almost everything was immediate. He said "God never changes, so sometimes I wonder why miracles aren't still immediate?" I responded with "I know some of them still are, but Dad, Jesus also let some people die just so he could show his power and raise them from the dead.........we really don't want that happening now, do we?"
He agreed with me, said that however the Lord wanted to handle things now was just fine with him, and we changed the subject.
Mom is patient........most of the time. Though this pneumonia has really drug a lot of her "good nature and temperament" to the point of screaming on most days. I think sometimes if she would actually scream, it would help her to recover faster. I know what it's like to be sick, but I don't know what it's like to have something that makes it; impossible to go outside because you can't breathe, a two person job to get you to the bathroom, and you so tired that you want to sleep but can't because you have insomnia. I guess it's just miserable, and I can't blame her for complaining.
Russ, on the other hand is probably the worst of us when it comes to the patience department, especially when he's worried. I can understand that as well, because he feels as though if someone's sick, they need care as soon as possible, and there's not a moment to waste. Sometimes that just can't happen, and he doesn't understand why. He couldn't understand why mom wasn't better after 2 days of antibiotics. After 2 weeks, you can imagine what he's thinking. At least the past couple days mom has shown improvement. I would have Russ AND dad jumping down my throat if she didn't feel better. 
And what could I do? I could take after my husband and lecture them. That's about it. Being married to Dan for 4 years has taught me a thing or two about psychology, human thought processes through asking simple questions, and the art of a good lecture. 
My parents tell a story about me a lot. It's the story of when I was born. Mom and Dad were married not quite 2 years when Russ was born. When he was about 2-3 years old, they wanted to have another baby, so their kids would be close in and grow up together. But they couldn't get pregnant. It went on for years and they were beginning to face the fact that it wasn't meant for them to have another child. Mom had always wanted a daughter so she prayed, and prayed, and prayed. Nothing happened. Their only son was about 16 years old and mom had some female issues that worried her so she went to see her gynecologist. Her cycle had been terrible and hadn't stopped, and after an exam, the doctor told her the news. She'd had a miscarriage. It was heartbreaking for her. I don't know what she went through that day, but I know it had to be hard. Not long after that when Russ was about 17, mom's cycle stopped altogether. She was scared because of the previous miscarriage, and perhaps there was something wrong with her. She suspected everything except what was actually wrong with her; Me. 
They couldn't believe it. Their son was graduating high school and mom was expecting me. Mom never wanted to find out from the doctor what she was having. She knew that her prayer had been answered and she would have a girl. And obviously she was right. If you can't already tell, the reason for this story is I think that was a huge lesson to them about patience and waiting on the Lord. 
Something that is so hard to realize about waiting, is the fact that we can't see the future. I mean, if I had been born back when mom and dad first wanted me, there's no telling where I would have been when mom lost her arm. Or when the brain tumor hit? It's amazing to think about. I'm not bragging on myself by any means, but I am glad that I'm here close to help when they let me. I like my little comfy house, I love my husband, and I am incredibly blessed.
I think about that sometimes when I'm having trouble waiting. I can't change the past, I don't know the future. All I have is the present. And I'm not guaranteed that. So, we trust in the Lord.....and we wait.